Have you ever had suspicions that you cant get rid of? No matter how hard your try you can't seem to forget about it or ignore it? Even trying to reason with yourself is a complete waste? And even when you do succeed at distracting yourself, the problem is its temperary, and you go right back to those suspicions in no time? I obviously do, (otherwise why would i be talking about it, right?) and would love to believe that they arent true, but it seems that they must be, i think. Have you had suspicions that you want to figuere out, to find out if your right, but at the same time are scared to find out for the same reason? I dont want to know that im right, but i still feel the need to know, even though i know im probably just going to end up regretting not just letting it go. I feel like im stuck in a rut, and dont want to know where the ladder is, but i keep searcing anyway. And when i do find the ladder, its broken; the steps are missing.

if you didnt notice, i feel emo, and i have to many emotions to actually understand how im feeling. Ohh well, i geuss ill get over it eventually...>.<

p.s. i misssss sooooraaa sooo muccchhh, nyaaaa!! <3